Disjointed & Deteriorated Ramblings
Or
Maybe I have Dementia
LoL
I suppose I have fanciful thoughts of the 60’s... I’ve always thought I was born too late...
to an era that didn’t really suit me... I know the 60’s were a time of mixed emotions ...
with WW 2 still sharp in peoples’ memories and the Vietnam War raging...
our men fighting and dying... our women worrying and crying... ours, your people and mine.... conscientious objectors protesting...
I imagine you and I will have various opinions on the turbulence & excitement of that era
... me, I would still have been me if I’d been born a little earlier
with flowers in my hair and unconventional attire...losing myself in the music of the era…
smoking pot and wanting to save the world with love........ you, well I don’t know what you were doing... were you old enough to protest or to go to war towards the end? Where you even born yet?
My mother and father had been dating for two years when she discovered she was expecting me…she was only 16.... they hastily married before she started to show
and moved in with her parents ...
I think the marriage was doomed to failure because of that... I was born the 16th day of March, 1961, 9lbs would you believe... by the time I was one my parents had separated and divorced...
my mother’s mother was, from what I hear, a very hard woman...
she would not let my father visit me often and taught me to call him by his first name rather than ‘Daddy’... subsequently I didn’t see him much... my grandmother passed away when I was little older than two, of leukaemia; I think her death was a great blow to my mother.... my earliest memories are living with my mother’s oldest sister and her 9 children....
but by the time I was 5 my mother remarried... her husband was neither loving or cruel...
absent most of the time, even when he was home... he was a barrister;
my brother was born the January before my 6th birthday and I was noticeably passed to the background...
(hmmm all this sounds vaguely familiar... as if I’ve told you before.... have I? Am I going over something I’ve already shared... that would be tedious for you)...
... at this point I was living in the outer, outer suburbs of Sydney....Sydney is Australia’s biggest city with a population of roughly 5,000.000.... just for interest sake, although that today’s figures not the 60’s ...
....anyway... I lived in the outer burbs... it was peaceful in a sense… I mean there was no political upheaval or riots or protest marches… there was little crime and from memory no abject poverty….
it was simply an insular suburban life…
sometime after my 9th birthday my mother separated from my stepfather
moving in ( with my brother & I) with a much older neighbour;
he later became my second stepfather and my mother’s life partner….
that when my life really took a turn…. for good & bad…
(you know something, I’m sure I’ve followed this line of thought with you all …. sometimes I worry I’m in the early stages of dementia)...
Here’s a silly poem instead.....
If Only…
I wish I’d been at Woodstock
In 1969
Swaying to the music
In the rain and clear sunshine
Dancing in mud puddles
With people I didn’t know
But I was just a little kid
And far too young to go…
I’d have worn purple love beads
Round my neck
And flowers in my hair
And danced until the sun come up
If only I’d been there…
I wish I’d been at Woodstock
And heard Joe Cocker sing
And been there when Credence
Got up to do their thing
I would have danced the day away
And long into the night
You would have found me swaying still
In the morning’s pure dawn light…
And I’d have worn
A long green dress
With wilted flowers in my hair…
Purple love beads
Round my neck
…if only I’d been there…
…if only I’d been there…
Sharonlee
Soooo..... some time has passed.... I did the dishes and finally unpacked my suitcase… I’ve been home 5 days… living out of my suitcase in lounge room, Lol…. I’ve made a fresh coffee and spent some time gazing absently out the double glass doors…. the day has changed in the time I’ve been watching…. rain clouds have gathered and the late afternoon has lost its humidity… grey shadows throw the day into an early twilight…
... anyway... very poor conversationalist tonight, aren’t I....
.... sigh... I honestly can’t remember what I’ve told you and what I haven’t... and I’ve lost my train of thought…. so I might just go sit on the veranda and hope for rain… some rain would be nice…..
... hope you sleep/slept well
Yours.... sharonlee©
6-Nov-11
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